No Apologies

Is your first response when you see someone not happy to apologize? “I’m sorry,” you might say. Perhaps you say it because you are truly sorry they are not happy, or perhaps you say it out of habit or worse yet, that you actually believe you are somehow responsible for their displeasure. Well, as my husband tells me almost daily, “Stop it.”

I am guilty of apologizing even when I have nothing to do with another person’s unhappiness. I think a lot of women are programmed to needlessly apologize. Collectively, we need to “stop it.” We should not be blaming ourselves or taking responsibility for how other people feel. Rarely does another person feel the way they do directly because of us. Rather, negative feelings and attitudes are usually formed from a combination of events and circumstances, many of which date back before we encounter a person. Some people are just predisposed to negativity and a refusal to understand and empathize with others. In fact, in my Lemonspark podcast I have had conversations about people who define themselves by being negative. They do not want to let go of that trait, even if it drives everyone else around them crazy.

Yet, a lot of us will still apologize when we sense things are not all right in the world, especially women. A 2010 study found that women are more likely than men to feel responsible for wrongdoing than men, and therefore apologize more. More frequent apologies fuels toxic self-blame and undermines your confidence, creating a vicious cycle of more apologies. And as women, we absolutely need more confidence. At Pursesuitz, our mission is to empower women to venture out with confidence. Our Pocketwear gives women that opportunity, granted in a small way by giving her functional pockets to store her most essential items securely and discreetly, but all ways that boost confidence, both big and small, are welcome.

Confidence in ourselves and in our affairs is essential to success and enjoyment. I was recently reminded of how important it is to be confident in who we are and in the decisions we make, no matter how others respond. I exhibited at a Travel and Adventure Show to raise awareness about Pursesuitz Pocketwear and the freedom and security the Pocketwear Tank Top can bring to female travelers. As women passed by my booth, inevitably they would ask about the price of the tank tops. The retail prices range from $74 for Level One tanks up to $94 for Level Three tanks. I could see their disbelief and disappointment when I told them the price. As a new entrepreneur, and as a woman, my first inclination was to apologize and explain why I settled on those prices. But my explanation didn’t matter. They didn’t care about the quality of the fabric, or the ever-increasing supply chain costs of getting the product manufactured, or most importantly, that Pursesuitz Pocketwear is a patent-pending design that doesn’t exist anywhere else. They cared about the fact that they could buy a tank top (granted, without pockets) at Wal-Mart, Target, or Costco for a fraction of the price.

True, you can buy a tank top at any of those big box stores for a fraction of the price, but that is not the point. The point is you can’t buy a Pursesuitz Pocketwear Tank Top at any of those stores for a fraction of the price. In fact, at the moment, you can only purchase them through the Pursesuitz website or directly from me at a trade show. Pursesuitz’s brand is about female empowerment. It is more than just a tank top. It is a statement about female independence and confidence, and the quality of the product is an investment in your overall security. When you purchase Pursesuitz, you are making a statement just like you would be if you purchased a Lexus over a Toyota, or a Louis Vuitton bag over a big box store special, or an Airstream camper over any other type of travel trailer. You pay extra for luxury items. Luxury items usually offer the same basic functions as a much less expensive option. But that is not why you spend extra for the luxury brand. You pay more for the luxury brand because you believe in it and the statement it makes when you associate yourself with it.

That is what Pursesuitz is aiming to build – a brand that announces to the world that you are a strong, confident woman and you are willing to spend a little extra to give you that boost as you venture out into the world. Pursesuitz is here for you, cheering you on and anxious to see what you can do with your new found freedom. I am not apologizing for that, or the price that goes along with providing women a product that boosts their security and confidence.

Are you ready to buy your confidence-boosting Pocketwear Tank? If so, purchase it here.